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A Bipolar Life

Hi, today I want to talk about medication, mania, voices and finding the right doctor.. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder about a year ago.. I have been hearing voices for two years.. well I’ve been hearing them on and off.. depends on my mood.. so a few weeks ago I was really manic, so manic my mom had to call my doctor.. so the doctor saw me on an emergency appointment.. He tried to talk to me but he couldn’t keep me focused.. so he wanted to give me new medication but I resisted.. I told him he was crazy and a drug dealer.. He then agreed with my mom that I would stay on my current medication.. but lately my mom wants to change doctors but you see the thing is, I have trust issues so finding a doctor that I trust would be hard.. and I don’t like female doctors.. so he got me down from my mania and I was normal for a while but then I started hearing voices again and it gets me down.. and people don’t understand what it’s like and then they say just take your medication but every time they say that a part of me dies because it reminds me that I’m sick.. and the voices also keep reminding me that I’m sick and worthless.. Bipolar disorder is not fun I hate it.. I want to be normal..

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